Never a man enough for you,
Unsure of how to act or what to do.
You turned your back and lied to me,
Leaving me alone, scared and unable to see.
The difference you loathed and feared so much,
Was the thing that would eventually become my crutch.
Be a man you would yell and always say,
Don't show them you're a faggot, poofter or even gay.
Closed eyes, not wanting to see who I truly am,
Instead criticizing me, pushing me away from our clan.
Punched, kicked and beaten to my very core,
It seemed through all this, you disowned me more and more.
I needed you, your words, your guidance, your love,
Not a day went by that I wished god would take me to the safety above.
Masculinity, who or what does it even truly mean?
I have seen an ideal; boring, baseless, almost like a smokescreen.
Those that have have had a supportive Father walk with pride,
Those like me, that have gone without, simply learnt how to cower and hide.
To be a man means more than being macho, big and grand,
It's loving those around you, being honest and always taking a stand.
Masculinity, what is it?